To be able to bear a child is a gift, especially for the “to be parents” who are most excited to welcome the fruit of their love to the world.
Just like a pair of gay dads in Portland, Oregon who are expecting a baby together after one of them, who is a transgender, became pregnant.
Trystan Reese, 34, and Biff Chaplow, have revealed that they will be welcoming a child this summer after experiencing a heart-breaking miscarriage at six weeks in 2016, when trans-dad Trystan became pregnant for the first time.
The married couple are already parents to two children that they adopted in 2015.
They announced the good news on WNYC podcast, the Longest Shortest Time, with Trystan telling all about his journey as a pregnant dad.
Trystan initially wanted to wait for a year before they had another go at conceiving after the unfortunate miscarriage they have experienced, but given the complications of restarting and then going off testosterone again led to the dads trying again right away.
It took longer the second time for the couple to conceive, they even became worried that they had missed their ‘only chance.’ But then, six months into trying, Trystan woke up feeling sick. After Biff took the kids to school, Trystan took a pregnancy test and discovered the good news.
Fortunately, this time things were different, though they felt frightened that the miscarriage may occur again, they became obsessed with every little detail in the early days. Trystan began ‘obsessively’ weighing himself and took multiple other pregnancy tests in the weeks to come.
When it came to the six-week ultrasound appointment, the couple called ahead to the ob-gyn’s office to let them know in advance, and make a note in his chart, about how they would be treating a pregnant trans-dad.
Trystan felt it was a necessary precaution, based on his experience as a transgender individual.
“I can feel someone looking at my face and searching for the remnants of womanhood,” he said.
“They kind of squint their eyes a little bit and I can tell they’re trying to take away my beard, they’re trying to de-transition me in their heads,” he added.
However, his fears were happily unfounded.
“There just hasn’t been an ounce of transphobia from anyone I have come in contact with,” he said.
“Every person wouldn’t even bat an eye that there was a dude with a beard claiming to be pregnant who is here to get bloodwork done – and I have been trans long enough to know that doesn’t come magically,” Trystan said.
Biff and Trystan first gained attention for sharing their journey to ‘accidental’ parenthood in 2011, their niece and nephew were put into their care after Biff’s sister and her boyfriend were deemed unfit to care for them due to substance abuse issues.
Riley and Hailey (names of their adopted children) had plenty of emotional baggage from their previous neglectful environment, but thanks to Biff and Trystan, they are now happy, healthy and loved.